What is happening? The world is stop turning? Really? No... the world is in fact still turning although we heard the news that slashes like a sharp blade in a sudden.
It looks like a plain advertisement on a newspaper that no one would even care to look, unless they are searching for something (jobs, cars, etc). Here it is, the engagement news that breaks many girls' heart, including me. The thing is, my reason for crying is different.
I always see Ben as a portrait of a bachelor who doesn't bother about marriage or having kids, his life is all about fun and happiness, also parties. I always see him as a happy pill because I myself can never have such pleasures, the happiness he got from drinking, sex and all those mature things. Let's say I have a lot of restriction, therefore I see Ben as a person who knows how to have fun without worries. Sometimes we do that, you know. Instead of being jealous to other people, we enjoy the life we cannot have through someone whom we think able to get or to live in it. That is probably the way I see Ben. He lives without commitment. He likes kids but that doesn't mean he has to have one. He is like a person I look up to, for being so carefree and without commitment.
But now everything is collapsing.. I have to start to believe that someone has to marry in order to continue living. I lose my belief in seconds that one can also be happy without getting married because Ben will get married which means his life until now was not that happy, just as I thought. How can I deal with this?
I am not sad because he chose someone else instead of me. First of all, I never thought myself as someone holding potential to be his wife (even if he were not a celebrity, I still have many things to pass before marrying him in peace, see my complication already?). It is not about why he chose that woman, but it was about losing a firm belief... or something I've been trying to hold on to.
People get married, we know that. But George Clooney got married... and now Benedict Cumberbatch. How can these free-spirited people finally got their guts to enter marriage stage? Like how? My shock especially goes to George Clooney because he is a person who made a lot of statement that probably the last thing he wants to do is getting married, but he got married. Why?
If I can make conclusion now, those two people are tired of playing around being fool and all and now they decide to settle down and build families? Is that what exactly happen?