20131213

Taeyang Dream: Why?

I'm so upset this morning.. because I don't know whether the dream that I have is actually a nightmare or a nice one.. Do you know Taeyang, a member of a Korean boyband, BIGBANG? Well, lemme get this straight, I am not a fan of him, ok? I just like one song from him, entitled 외딩 드레스 (Wedding Dress), to the point that I can play it over and over, but that's it. No feeling or anything towards him, he's not my style, like at all.

This is his appearance if you want to know Taeyang, his real name is 동영배 (Dong Young Bae).


He is just ordinary type of guy with no special effort in make up to make him looking fabulous. He's adorable just being himself, his natural self. His eyes are so slanted, just like a normal Asian eyes should be, and he has such a sweet smile. 

Okay, enough about Taeyang, I will tell about my dream. The setting was in a place like hotel sort of, there are a lot of people there, including some Doosan Bears players (baseball team from Korea that I adore) and we are doing some sort of reality show, I am not sure what kind. We did things separately as I do have some sort of separate room interview and I don't know with others. I cannot remember anything being asked in the interview, all I know I was having trouble in some questions because I don't know what to answer. I was so devastated after the interview that I just throw myself at a sort of a bed in the middle of an open room, so basically anyone can just use the bed, it's not a private one. I just laid myself there, facing the bottom (freefaller position, you can Google this) or something like this:


All of sudden Taeyang just approached me, I just opened a bit of my eyes and then go back to close my eyes because I was not in the mood for talking. But somehow he sits next to me, comfortably put his legs on the bed and start talking. 
태: 인터뷰 너무 잘한다 (judging from the way he speaks to me, we already know each other before)
나: 그래? 안 그랬는데.. 인터뷰 넘 어렵다.. 대답 못했어 내가. 속상해...
태: 아니야~ 네 그런 모습 넘 좋다.. 
나: 뭐? 봤어? 어디? 어떻게 봤어? 아아아.. 창피해..
태: 밖에서... 티비 있는데.. 그 방 지났을때 널 봤어.. ㅎㅎ
나: 보지마 그냥~
태: 벌써 봤는데 어떻게 안보이게 해야 돼? ㅋㅋㅋ (he chuckles)



Actually my heart beat really fast thinking why he decided to stop and saw me doing the interview?
나: ... 너 스케줄 없어? 
태: 했어.. 다 했어.. 
.............
나: 응원했어 고마워~ 나두 니 노래 엄청 좋아거든... 
태: 정말..? He moved his fingers to my fingers, he really touched my fingers and I got more nervous. 
나: 어~ 외딩 드레스 그 노래 너무 마음에 들어
태: 슬픈 노래 그게
나: 알아... 근데 좋아~ out of nowhere I said something like.. 넌 날 좋아했지? 나두 널 좋아해.. 우리 사귀면 어때? ㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎ It was just a joke tho.. I mean.. bcos he likes my performance at the interview and I like his song... It was supposed to be a joke but he reacted differently. He holds my hand even tighter.. 
태: 진짜 사귀면 되? 그럼 사귀자 우리!!!
나: 뭐? 야... 그게 농담이야.. Why so serious?? Hahaha *fake laughs*
태: 난 널 좋아해... *still holding my hand*
I changed my position to face him better, he still holds my hand, and I put my head on a pillow... ready to lecture him. But he suddenly moves closer to me and yes.. 날 키스했어... I was so shocked, not able to say anything.. and then he hold my hand and we got out from there together, holding hands. 

We went outside to a small car and we went in together.. suddenly some Doosan players were around us and they are doing the same thing... I think it was supposed to be a competition that involves car. They say us holding hands and Choi Junseok teased us, "야.. 니들 사귀냐?" I looked at Taeyang and he answered firmly "어! 왜?" 

Then I woke up and realized it's all just a dream. I feel sad. I really thought it was super real but of course it was not. Taeyang is the kindest person in Bigbang. Does this mean I will get a super kind person as a husband? Hahaha

I actually have promised to myself that I will not allow myself to be involved in any romantic relationship, except marriage but when Taeyang was with me I feel like I will allow him to be my boyfriend. I just wonder, if someone really comes but he doesn't offer marriage but just relationship, will I take it which means I will break my own promise? I don't know. But this dream really makes me sad. Why happiness go away really fast? 

/jingga

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