What I want...

This is a post that I've been wanting to write... LOL~
You know a wish can come true, and a wish means prayer, that is why I am writing this :D
Actually my criteria of ideal man (이상형 in Korean) is really simple... but point number 1 has to be fulfilled, while other points can be optional~ Let's start?
1. I want a moslem guy:
Well, since I am a moslem, there's a rule in my religion that I can marry only a moslem guy, so this thing is an obligatory for me. This requirement is actually the hardest obstacle that I found because well, moslem guys, the old fashion ones are very OLD FASHION, they want their wives to be mostly at home and practically wives must do what the hubby wants.. O_O You know that doesn't sound like me, right? Me = stubborn, can't follow that kinda thought, especially from a man OTL
Since I pursue of getting moslem hubby, I have said goodbye to all Korean dudes out there. Man, I am not for you, please find someone else who are prettier, easier, funnier, etc. I am just a little complicated chick that just need to be left alone in the corner... ;ㅅ;
2. I have a thing for funny guy:
Damn, I dunno how many times I fell for 못 생긴 guys only because they are extremely funny. I just think myself as a serious and worrier, therefore I need someone who can cheer me up, makes me laugh everyday and just turning my world into a better place. I love to joke, I laugh a lot when people jokes... When I laugh, I shed tears... Seriously! But since I was a kid, my humor taste is kinda weird. I laugh on things that ppl thought ain't funny and I don't even smile on something that ppl thought it's funny.. well, not all the time but sometimes. I don't really get British jokes, seriously are they even jokes? O_O Anyway, yeah... that's what I want, a funny man. When I was in Korea, I watched a lot of gagshow, thinking that I wanna date them, ehm... if they won't act weird in daily basis, maybe I will date them.. Hahaha... They are so weird and embarrassing!! T__T 
3. I like kind hearted guy:
This quality can make me fall really deep on someone. I just have this thing since forever. I am a sensitive person, that is why I am easily touched by people's words/acts. Some guys that I fall for, they are not even handsome.. but they are kind (most of them). Let's say Soobin, he is very kind hearted. He respects his parents and he is always nice to people. He signs when the situation permits and he pays food when he asked people out (someone I kno in twitter happened to be Soobin's Bears mate friend named Jinho, so Soobin once asked her to eat with him and Jinho, then he paid). I just think an ethical guy is the best because a man like that can give good examples for my kids later. I myself likes polite people and I treasure people who can treat other politely. I am Asian and we have our own virtues, I guess. Politeness leads to great order in life and environment. 
4. I like smart/talented guy: 
I dated a guy who was clearly doing worse academically more than me. His way of thinking was also backward~ He was the one who told me not to pursue my dream to study in Korea. We broke up, he got married and I realized my dream. How awesome is that? :) I just want someone who is smarter, who can see things with his wide point of view. He shouldn't act smart tho, he shouldn't talk a lot as well. I love silence too and I can't stand a man chirping most of the time, especially when he is bragging about something. LOL~ Total turn off. 
5. I like a guy with deep voice:
Here we go, we start to talk about things I like the most. I think it's not a secret anymore between my friends that I am fond of guys with deep voice... I can go die listening to them talking. God, why so seductive, what I should do to you? Should I kill myself so that I can stop my head to think only about you? To be honest, my recent crush goes to BAP's leader Bang Yongguk. DON'T EVEN DARE TO TALK ABOUT HIS AGE, OKAY!! Since the first time I heard him at Song Jieun's "Going Crazy" I went crazy over his voice... Too bad, he wasn't appeared much on TV when I was in Korea. Only a few weeks before I went back to home for good, they started their activity and by that time all I wanted to do was to enjoy Korea as much as I can (instead of fangirling). I just think a guy with deep voice is really calming~ I dunno.. I like it!! *sobs* 
6. To be added later

Now I want to post and explain some crushes that happened to me within these 2 years... I will only post the major ones, the ones that really leave good impression to me until now. 
1. Kim Jongwoon (Yesung @ Super Junior)

His charm captivated me since long time ago and somehow he always finds a way to get back to me. Sometimes I got frustrated of not being able to understand him and what he did to fans and all. Well, my first reason to like him was his voice. His voice was the exact type of voice that I like. I fell for him really hard. What a stupid period, really~ I was glad that I could get out of that period and being what I am now. It feels good to be realistic. He is really a man of my dream, I like how he is a man of action. He always looks people in the eye while talking to them. He is very mysterious. Even being his fan for almost 3 years maybe, I still think I don't understand what's in his mind~ Maybe a man like him won't be good for me because both of us are heavy thinkers. Damn... how I wish I can get to know him as a friend instead~ He has a good quality inside of him. 

2. Jung Soobin of Doosan Bears (professional baseball club in Seoul, #31) 

Can I just wish that he's not younger than me? He has all the quality that I want as a husband. He's kind, he's good to his parents, he's not showing off, he doesn't let fame affects him for being himself, he is down to earth, he is so ordinary that it hurts to feel that actually he's untouchable. Oh dear God, he was my heavy crush as well. Since the first time I stepped my feet to baseball field, I always looked at him. Mostly at him. First thought of course his cuteness... but then later on slowly I learn about who he is, what kind of person he is. I was so in love. To see him in the field was the only thing that I have in my head when I went to the games. I was not delusional or whatever but I just saw how he is down to earth, more of shy person, and he never tries to gain popularity by doing O_o things. I just see him as someone who is very polite to people. Once I met a Korean girl named Sunny, she is a friend of Doosan Bears' outfielder named Jung Jinho (no relation with Soobin, btw). Jung Jinho is almost at the same age as Soobin so they are friends. Once Jinho met Sunny and then they met Soobin, Guess what? Soobin took them out to eat together and then he paid the food. Gosh, he was so nice to people. He is never acting cocky or whatever. 
One day he did a mistake on the field, a fatal blunder, he was so sad that he closed his cyworld. I was so sad as well thinking that he might be really stressed out. Other people would act ignorant after a few days but for him, he needed a few weeks to finally recovered and played well on the field. 
Oh, I was also told by a friend that he has facebook but rarely using it. I added him as friend and I wrote a facebook message. I introduced myself, gave some supporting words, asking him an address to send gifts (this is stupid, why I was asking a "celeb" where to send gifts? OTL), the bottom line is I LOVE YOU, BABY!! CAN'T YOU SEE? lol...
Guess what? He replied to me months after that (bcos he seldom logged in to his fb account) with something like this...

3. Bang Yongguk (BAP's leader)

Welcome to my list, another kiddie, Bbang!! What can I say? His voice is my damn type and his bad boy style (his banmal language), I like him. He's like a dream guy in my wildest dream? Hahaha.. The dark side of me might want a guy like him. LOL~ Naaahhh... I like him also because he is very nice, especially to fans. He smiles a lot during fansigns and whenever they have activities in tv stations, etc. He's that smiley guy who never looks frowny~ He's always that smiley everywhere which means he is a very cheerful person as well. I don't know much about him yet, but so far his voice and his smile captivate me the most. Too bad that I had to leave Seoul before they got to their 2nd album. I got to see them live tho, once only OTL

Okay, I think that is all for today. I don't even know what I chirped just now. Please pray for me, so that I can get my dream guy!



네 품에 잠들고 싶어...

The guy whom I was talking didn't pay attention and he kept talking to me.

Kangin was so close beside me, I started to feel uneasy...

Then he played with my hand... like touching it.

I slightly looked at him, to tell him to go away... For God's sake I'm still talking with this guy!!

He moved aside... so his back met my back.

Again, he grabbed my hands. This time it was like a real grab, no longer a touch.

I tried to let it go but he insisted.

After that, the guy I talked to left us and I looked at Kangin...

"제 손을 왜 잡아요?" (My hand, why are you holding it?)

"아니... 그냥"

And then.. I remembered that I wanted to take picture together with him.

I took out my iPod (yep, the one with green case) and tried to do selca.

Somehow he moved closer so our face could fit the iPod screen.

And then a girl came out of nowhere... took Kangin on the wrist and started to dragged him to leave.


He gave me his final sad look...

Somewhere in my memory, I dunno when... He said, "I actually like you, but I'm engaged. Can't we just runaway together"?



Hey Ma by Soul Connection

Long time no see.. hello hello~ ㅋㅋ
Let's try the first post with a lyric from a song that I play on repeat lately. ^^

널 사랑하는 내 자신이 너무 미워
다시 날 사랑하게 해달라고 밤새 기도해
널 떠나보내고 또 노래
부르고 또 불러 I, I wanna go back

hey my girl 제발 돌아와줘 아직 난 그대로
멈춰있어 네가 떠난 그 후로 내 삶의 99%
오직 너만 바라보며 꿈으로 부풀었던
내 맘의 한가운덴 어린애로 변해버린 내가 서있어
밤새도록 술과 담배로 지샌 시간이 더 길어질수록
맘 상하기만 했던 내 바보같은 태도 떠올라 귓가에
맴도는 가사
다, 다 우리 얘기같아 살살 녹아버릴 초콜릿
사탕보다 달콤하게 두 눈에 고이는 눈물에 보이는
내 사랑

hey girl listen 떠나갈 때 너의 눈빛은
나를 떠밀어 미치게 만들어버린 다음에 내 옷길을
스치고 지나가는 바람처럼 가볍던 kiss
그것만을 남기고는 돌아섰지 몸을 씻어
봐도 지우지 못해 내 온 몸 그리고 옷에
남겨진 니 흔적 때문에 괴로워 괴로워해
girl, U just don't know, It was all lie and show
알고있지만 난 모르는 척 다 덮어버렸어

니가 있다면 난 더이상 눈물짓지 않아
I don't wanna be without you girl
I don't wanna be without you girl
니가 없다면 난 더이상 숨을 쉴 수가 없어
I don't wanna be without you girl
I don't wanna be without you girl

hey girl 너를 본 순간부터 내 몸
얼어붙어 꼼짝달싹 하지못해 서툰데도 계속
니 앞에서 온갖 폼 다 잡고도 좀 더
멋지게만 보이고싶고 너를 보면 그저 웃음을 짓고
어떻게든 잘 되고싶은 맘 뿐야
널 갖기 위해 나는 매일마다 숨가쁜데
너 밖엔 없어 널 기다리다 지쳤어
어서 돌아와 줘 my lady, my baby, my girl

그댄 날 지나쳤지 멍하게 남겨둔 채
난 기대만 하곤했지 니가 품에 닿을수 있게
너 없는 난 필요없잖아 난 너 밖에 모르잖아
I don't wanna be without U girl, girl 단 한사람
내게 유일하게 빛이 날 아름다운 별 넌
걸을때도 반짝여 날어갈듯한 balloon
잡을 수가 없었어 떠나보내야만 했어
널 향한 마지막 인사는 난 기다려 계속

니가 있다면 난 더이상 눈물짓지 않아
I don't wanna be without you girl
I don't wanna be without you girl
니가 없다면 난 더이상 숨을 쉴 수가 없어
I don't wanna be without you girl
I don't wanna be without you girl

아무리 생각해봐도 이건 아닌데 믿을 수가 없어 왜
잡을수 없을만큼 넌 떠나갔는데 이제 난 어떻게 해
아무리 생각해봐도 이건 아닌데 난 정말 미칠것만 같아
다시 내 곁에 돌아와줘

니가 있다면 난 더이상 눈물짓지 않아
I don't wanna be without you girl
I don't wanna be without you girl
니가 없다면 난 더이상 숨을 쉴 수가 없어
I don't wanna be without you girl
I don't wanna be without you girl

널 사랑하는 내 자신이 너무 미워
다시 날 사랑하게 해달라고 밤새 기도해
널 떠나보내고 또 노래
부르고 또 불러 I, I wanna go back

I really like this song... I really do. The beat is perfect and the lyric is awesome.